ACTING CHRIST-LIKE

"Try to give me a little more Aretha..." "Do it again but with more soul." "Maybe try a more southern accent" "I need a Gospel flair." Let's back up a little. Not that I need  to give any explanation of myself, but it does help with the context of my dilemma. My mom was half white and half native American. My dad is black. I grew up in a town where all of my friends were either Mexican (yes specifically Mexican), or white. I had a couple of black friends and Native friends growing up, but nearly all of my friends were LatinX. My parents separated when I was in elementary school and I spent most of my life being raised by my (white-passing) mother. Growing up, I questioned my blackness. People didn't start specifically referring to me as black until I was nearly in high school. I always knew I was a little  black. But there came a turning point where I was specifically and solely categorized as black. But I did not have

When I was fresh out of high school I would sometimes tell people that certain situations gave me anxiety. Now your experience might be different, but this was a time where everyone wasn't saying they were anxious. Maybe they had  it and didn't know, but I didn't really know a lot of people who were open with the fact. So when I said this, some people didn't believe me. I'm so outgoing and talkative and I could see why people might have thought that I was exaggerating. AND at the time the idea of anxiety seemed more like a serious medical problem rather than a common struggle that everyday people had. I've realized lately that I have been succumbing to some of these anxious thoughts. In the past I would struggle with walking into a room with a group of people that a) I didn't know or b) it was my first time. So walking into class on the first day of school or walking into a party by myself.  Since I've started auditioning for shows a lot of the